I finally had my appointment with the urogynecologist yesterday.
I had to answer a lot of questions about pee. I guess anyone with “uro” in their job title must talk about pee a great deal. I had to cough had over a pad on the floor while unclothed. I had to pee “in the commode in the corner” to make a urine sample to make sure I didn’t have an infection. Little did I know the secret powers on the innocent-looking commode. I peed in the cup. Then something started printing out in the corner of the room. It was my stats! The commode measured how long I peed, how fast I peed and how much I peed. I felt like a professional peer. I could be on a team for the NPL — not to be confused with the NFL or the NHL. It all felt a little silly.
Basically, it boils down to this: I’m sagging on the inside. She said from giving birth and “regular wear and tear” (giggle). So I can do one or several of three things: 1. Go to a physical therapist and really learn how to do some massive pelvic floor workouts. I called it “Pelvic Floor Boot Camp.” 2. I could have a pessary (?) a little support that I put in there to hold things together. 3. I could have surgery. Part of me would just like to have the surgery and get it all over with. The problem is, the recovery time is three weeks. I can’t take three weeks off from work. And I don’t really want to miss three weeks of summer. So I decided to go to boot camp. If it doesn’t work, I’ll consider the surgery at the end of the school year.
Man, that toilet was cool.