Always Traveling

My back hurts.

See, I got up at 4:48am. After getting up at 2:10 when Cakie came into our bed. Then we got up every five minutes or so while Cake rolled, kicked, and talked in our bed until A took him into the living room of our vacation condo. I got up at 4:48 and drove from Wildwood, NJ to 59th St. Manhattan. I listened to my gay boyfriend, Rufus Wainright, all the way up. The same CD. That’s something I can only get away with when driving alone. If you were to mapQuest it, it would say that the trip takes 2.5 hours. I took me three. Damn Lincoln Tunnel. Three hours to get to my IUI, you say? No. No. Three hours to get to my ultrasound. Yeah, just an ultrasound. On Thursday, Cakie’s second birthday, I get to do the drive again for the IUI. It was three hours of me saying to myself, You’re not that crazy. Some people fly every month to meet up with their fresh donors. It’s like having a long-distance relationship with a stranger. Some people commute this far several times a week, if not every day. Truck drivers do this all day.

My doctor also thought I was a little batty, but I explained that I need to try this month. I’m a teacher and school starts next month. This is going to be much more difficult when I’m supposed to be at work. I told him about how I’m reluctant to explain my latenesses to my boss, who is not the most sensitive person when it comes to taking childcare leave. I think he convinced me to tell her. He said I should put it in writing. I am protected under the Americans With Disabilities Act. She has to accommodate my special needs. I am thus-far dis-able to get knocked up. I think I might do it. I would love to not have to lie and worry about it every time. What do you guys think? What would you do?

Anyway, after falling asleep on the slanted examination bed and crying from exhaustion and emotion and possibly too much Rufus Wainright, I did learn that I have two — not one– TWO follicles on my left ovary. One is 18.5 mm and one is 14mm. Those are approximately the same size follicles as my friend’s who is now pregnant with twins. Wouldn’t that be ironic if I got pregnant with fraternal twins on my last natural cycle? Oh, did I mention that this is my last natural cycle? So much news.

I have a consultation next Wednesday to discuss the next steps with the doctor. Do you like how we’re all expecting this cycle not to work? It is all part of my master plan to be pessimistic this cycle. Right, like that’s going to work.

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8 Comments

Filed under IUI, TTC

8 responses to “Always Traveling

  1. We had our known donor fly to us. And there were a couple of doozies, like the time he wound up stopping for a refuel on the wrong side of Lake Michigan from us. But he really wanted to be our Uncle Donor.

  2. I think you should tell your boss because the monthly ‘what am I going to say’ conversations with yourself will make you too stressed out.

    Who knows – maybe your reverse psychology/anti-Polyanna thoughts will prove to be the key. It was after I pretty much gave up hope that I got pregnant with Sam. I will be optimistic for you in secret…

  3. I don’t think you’re nuts to drive that far to do this. It’ll certainly be worth it if it works. We too have done a 6 hour round trip for an insem, though our previous regular trip took us about 4. The clinic where we are now trying is a mere nip up the street at a 2 hour round trip! I’m sorry you’ll miss some of Cakie’s birthday, though.

    I’m impressed that you get covered under the ADA for fertility issues (is that what you meant?) I don’t think our DDA does that.

    And 2 follicles!! Twice as much not to get excited about!

  4. The drive sounds rough, but it’s not too bad distance wise. Driving into NYC just sucks. You are not crazy. We do a 2 hour round trip drive to a 30 min away OB’s office for IUI attempts.
    I might tend to agree with the “telling the boss” thing. Basically, because it’s hard to make up a story about what you are late or need time off at various intervals.
    I’m already thinking about what I am going to do when I start TTCing and I might just let it out.
    Two follicles! That’s a good sign.

  5. You are crazy. I don’t even like to schlep into Manhattan, if I can help it.

    Here’s hoping those magical down the shore waves make you fertile. Don’t forget the waffle and ice cream sandwich! I think it worked for my mom…

  6. Hmm, I hope that this time is the charm!

    If not, I think you should tell your boss and you should definatley put it in writing. It seems as if it would be too hard to negotiate everything
    (the travelling, the lateness and the anxiety) otherwise. I just hope that telling your boss will relieve stress not add to it.

    I haven’t told my boss yet and it is a monthly juggling act that gets tired after awhile.

  7. I often have the feeling. I feel that every month, we talk about next month before we even insem. Maybe it’s been jinxing us for the last year and a half! Arg!

  8. alli k

    I agree with the doctor. If you’re not knocked up this month, tell your boss, and DO document it. In a friendly, non-threatening way, of course.

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