… stirrups and all. I dragged my achey-from-packing-my-classroom body into Manhattan this morning to have Dr. Mug give me an ultrasound. Good news! I have a “very nice looking follicle” on my right ovary. The doc thinks I will be able to inseminate this cycle before we leave for vacation. Whew. I don’t think I could have standed waiting for another month.
Here’s the part where I overthink things: I wanted to make a list of reasons why it would be great to get pregnant this cycle.
1. The timing is really great for the school year. I want to take six months off, and it really needs to be including the two summer months. So having a baby in April or the end of March would fit right into my plan in a good way.
2. I wouldn’t have to try getting pregnant anymore.
3. This is a “natural” cycle (as natural as anything can be when a man is sitting between your lesbian legs, which are up in stirrups, putting a tube full of recently-thawed sperm into your vagina), which means that my risk of multiples is minimal.
I’m stopping the list here. I can’t start getting all set on this cycle working. I’ll work myself into a frenzy again that might end in one pink line and a bottle of wine. So I’ll stop overthinking and try to be more “in the moment.” Ohm.
Now I have to order more sperm. I still don’t know if any Cakiedonorsperm has popped up anywhere. So I have to choose another donor. It is not like choosing a topping for your pizza. It isn’t even like choosing a person to date. This choice will (hopefully) result in a child. If I choose guy A, I’ll have baby A, etc.
It is a little bit fun, though. Now that I’m unlawfully wed, it is the closest I’ll get to internet dating. I like trying to read between the lines in the short profiles. Which is, of course all conjecture and bias. When we chose Cakie’s donor, it was none of the guys I had so carefully chosen. Something went wrong with the first guy I chose, and so A said, “let’s just use this one,” and I said “if he’s male and they can swim, let’s do it.” I have to remember that.
The next ultrasound is on Monday morning. I’m hoping the actual insemination will be on Thursday, rather than Wednesday. I don’t really want to inseminate on the last day of school.
I’m excited! And zen. I am also zen.