Supersonic Commode

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I finally had my appointment with the urogynecologist yesterday.

I had to answer a lot of questions about pee.  I guess anyone with “uro” in their job title must talk about pee a great deal.  I had to cough had over a pad on the floor while unclothed.  I had to pee “in the commode in the corner” to make a urine sample to make sure I didn’t have an infection.  Little did I know the secret powers on the innocent-looking commode.  I peed in the cup.  Then something started printing out in the corner of the room.  It was my stats!  The commode measured how long I peed, how fast I peed and how much I peed.  I felt like a professional peer.    I could be on a team for the NPL — not to be confused with the NFL or the NHL.  It all felt a little silly.

 

Basically, it boils down to this:  I’m sagging on the inside.  She said from giving birth and “regular wear and tear” (giggle).  So I can do one or several of three things:  1.  Go to a physical therapist and really learn how to do some massive pelvic floor workouts.  I called it “Pelvic Floor Boot Camp.”  2.  I could have a pessary (?)  a little support that I put in there to hold things together.  3.  I could have surgery.  Part of me would just like to have the surgery and get it all over with.  The problem is, the recovery time is three weeks.  I can’t take three weeks off from work. And I don’t really want to miss three weeks of summer.  So I decided to go to boot camp.  If it doesn’t work, I’ll consider the surgery at the end of the school year.

Man, that toilet was cool.

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